The System Was Never Broken
On ANTM, Monica Lewinsky and the internalised misogyny that continues to fuel the system
Together with millions of women, I also grew up watching America’s Next Top Model (ANTM). And when the documentary about ANTM was released on Netflix last week, of course, I had to watch it. Not because I was nostalgic for the early 2000s, but because it was such a huge part of my teenage years. Anyone nostalgic for the 90s or 00s must have had a completely different experience than I did. I stopped watching the show long before the 24th season. But seeing this documentary just made me fucking angry. How was it normal to berate women for being themselves? Telling them to lose weight? Calling them plus-sized while they were a size 4? Showing a whole sexual assault on prime-time television?
The claim that “it was the time” or “we didn’t know better”. Of course they did. But it was more profitable for the companies to exploit other people’s pain. We watched young women being abused on television. No one stepped in. How could no one have done anything? That’s the part I don’t understand. But then again, I do understand. One of the most effective ways to preserve male power is not just through men but through other women. And how women’s conditioning to police, punish, and sacrifice other women. This is internalised misogyny as infrastructure.
What struck me most was the message this show sent to teenage girls like me. What did we internalise without even realising it? ANTM wasn’t the problem. Society in the 90s and 00s was deeply uncomfortable, seeing it with adult 2026 eyes. No one protected women or girls. Not on television and not in real life. Women became expendable and our bodies content. Being shamed for existing, for speaking up, for literally breathing. The cruelty was the point because it drew viewers and readers to the magazines that did the same thing. The problem wasn’t women like Tyra Banks. She was just a product of the system that rewarded her for doing it. Being a woman doesn’t mean you’re “safe” for women.
I was very young when Linda Tripp outed Monica Lewinsky for having an affair with the former president of the US, Bill Clinton, so I don’t remember much about it. But looking back at it now and reading how they treated her, it boils my blood. Not one woman protected her. Linda Tripp betrayed her by acting as her friend, only to report her to Ken Starr. Bill Clinton denied having sexual relations with her. Hillary Clinton defended her husband. Gloria Steinem, a prominent feminist, claimed that the relationship between Lewinsky & Clinton was “consensual”. She, obviously, forgot the enormous power imbalance between them. One was an intern, and the other one was the most powerful man in the world. And in the aftermath? Lewinsky was demonised, and her life was nearly destroyed, while he was politically rehabilitated.
Feminism that protects power at the expense of vulnerable women is not feminism. The ultimate betrayal of Lewinsky wasn’t from men; it was from women. Why is it always the go-to to blame women? Blame them for their husband cheating? Deciding power was more important than solidarity is a disgrace.
The Lewinsky story wasn’t an anomaly. Decades later, the same pattern of abuse, power, and silence would repeat itself.
Harvey Weinstein and the “Me Too” movement revealed, yet again, that powerful men will always get away with it until they don’t. I think what the “Me Too” movement taught us women, was that together we’re stronger than we are alone. This one man’s behaviour was an open secret in Hollywood. The system protected him. And women protected him, too. Women who were too afraid. Women who protected themselves by remaining quiet, thereby indirectly subjecting other women to his behaviour.
And with the release of the Epstein files, we see yet again that the system is rotten from the inside. Nothing will ever change if the people benefiting from the system don’t change or are removed. Jeffrey Epstein operated his network for decades. And the most powerful men in the world protected him. And Ghislaine Maxwell actively participated in and enforced the system. The patriarchy rewards compliance.
Internalised misogyny is equally, if not more, harmful for women. But it’s not a moral flaw. It’s conditioning. Women survive by aligning with power, even when that means throwing someone else under the bus. My generation grew up watching what happened to women who spoke up, resisted, or refused to play along; they were ostracised. A whole generation full of people-pleasing women who have internalised the belief that nothing they ever do is good enough.
The system is still alive and well. Built to protect power and silence women. It survives on our compliance. On our fear. On our silence.
Are you ready to drown out the silence?
Brilliantly put!